Yesterday about 4:00 pm I went to the emergency room with severe chest pains. Nine hours later I was admitted for the night. After a cat scan, numerous blood work, a stress test followed by more pictures - the doctor said it was not a heart attack.
I'm home now and glad to be feeling better. A little weak, but much better. Prognosis is good and we will work on few things they found, but I'm doing good.
In the middle of fear I had a wonderful experience that I would like to share.
The Bible says that God is everywhere. It says that God knows when even the smallest sparrow falls. The knowledge that God cares is all around us. It's in science and the medical field. It's in the sunrise, the surprise of children and the quickening of our souls when music fills the air.
The hardest place to find God is in the middle of fear. As our mind deals with the situation our body goes into overtime trying to release the pressure. We sweat, tremble, shake and cry. Our blood pressure goes up and our mind goes wild with the "what ifs". Worry takes over and it's not long until we are consumed with fear. We pray, but our prayers seem to hang in the air with little hope of reaching heaven.
I was in the middle of one of those experiences. I was scared about the outcome of my visit and I found it hard to feel God. After an especially hard pain I closed my eyes and used every part of my being to concentrate on God. It took several attempts. It was soft at first. Just a feeling that calmed me. With every breath it began to increase until finally an impression filled my head. It was soft and sweet like the pure sensation of holding a newborn baby. The only difference was that I was the baby being held by the hand of God.
"Debbie, I am here." I relaxed at the thought of his presence. The tremble ceased and the tears slowed. God was there. His presence was overwhelming and soothing. What I needed for the moment, he released to me. Never more than I needed. Just enough.
Through all the tests, the pokes, the iv's, the blood work - He was there. I kept repeating over and over, "It's me and you Lord. It's me and you."
Never forget that God is everywhere. Never forget that you are his child and He loves you.
Close your eyes, take a deep breath, whisper His name and He is there.
God loves you,
Debbie
1 comment:
God has never leat me down. I have never realy had to call on him, I always just knew he was there. Through every painful experience in my life, every scary situation and the darkest depression, I always felt my Lord at my side.
I think that through all of my struggles, I always knew the Lord was at my side. And now, when a situation arises, I believe firmly that my sprirt calls on the Lord, even though I don't conciously do it. I know that I know that I KNOW, that when something happens in my life, I KNOW Jesus is there and I take his hand and take another step, bear another day, smile when I just don't think I can. The Lord never promised me life would be easy, that I would always be happy or that I would avoid pain and loss. The Bible doesn't say "if" lifes storms, but "when" lifes storms arise, I will be with thee'.
I don't care what happens, well I do, but when hardship comes I know my savior is standing beside me with his arm around me and his promises guiding me.
I have had many dreams over the last 10 years where I am being attacked by some ungodly or sometimes evil forces. Each and every time, and without fail, I have cried out " In the name of the Lord Jesus Christ.." and the attacks ceased. Looking back those dreams usually preceeded a very difficult test in my faith or a trying time in my life and I always remember to call on the name of the Lord, my "back-up" in a time of battle.
I often wonder how people who do not know the Lord get through life. That is a life I cannot understand because I have always known God loved me and was my friend. I may not belong to any clubs, or be in the "in" crowd or have a lot of friends, but I know that I belong to THE Club. I klnow that I am a child of God and that Heaven is my home. I am privliged that my name is written in the Lambs Book of life. I often look at the trials of life as just a speed bump on my road Home. The road to my Lords waiting arms.
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