If all goes well, on May 7th, I will be posting a new page on the website that I hope will help everyone. Several of you have been concerned about raising "close" families. So many children are raised not only to leave the nest but to abandon family relationships as well. What exactly can a parent do to strengthen those bonds so that when children move out the relationship simply switches from child to adult without breaking the love and interaction you shared?
You will be able to find my new page at the "Articles" tab under Family Etiquette. The advice will be short and to the point. I'll deal with issues from babies through young adulthood as well as between spouses and in-laws. I'll try to save reading time by only posting short "lessons". If you need more information you are welcome to contact me through my e-mail.
We all long for close family ties. Coming from a good family will give you wings to soar into your dreams. Dealing with hurts from your family can leave you with improper guilt and self-esteem issues that will prevent your enjoyment of success no matter how talented you are.
Just because someone is related to you doesn't mean they automatically love you. Love can be destroyed. You can allow time and circumstances to build walls between you and anyone in your world. Just like other needs, families require effort to be strong. Follow the rules of family etiquette - cover it with love and you will have a winning formula for a better life.
Teaser: If you treat your friends or co-workers better than you do your family, you are headed for trouble. Instead, you should give more breaks and more love to family members.
If some people I know treated their family members with the same respect they gave to their friends, there would be no strife at all in their family.
Would you scream at your friend and tell them to get out of your life? Would you say no to a co-worker because you didn't want to be bothered helping them with a new project? Would you tell your best friend you hate her and yet still expect her to call you for lunch?
Why then do people scream "I hate you" at their parents or other family members and wonder why things are so hard at home? How can you go out of your way to do favors for people at work who can help you, yet complain because your family asks you to pick up milk on the way home? When frustrated parents yell at their adult children and admit they wish they would leave; why are they surprised when two years later that same child hasn't called or been home?
Duh!?!
Look into the future...see how your actions today will change the feelings of those around you. If you can hold your temper with friends -- you are capable of holding it with family. And if you can't hold your temper with friends....Get Some Professional Help. Explosive anger will ruin your life.
Homework for today: Go to everyone in the house and tell them one thing you like about them. Give them a kiss and a big hug. Smile and walk away happy. You have just started a new trend of love.
God loves you
Debbie
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