Thanks for all the concern about my hand. It's much better and I'm finally able to type. I'm a little behind on my work - but with the help of four secretaries and twelve maids I should be finished by July 2008.
Humor is wonderful. I don't know how I could possibly get through life without a good laugh. I love the scene in Steel Magnolias where Sally Field is crying over the death of her daughter. She's screaming at her friends trying to express her pain.
M'Lynn: No! No! No! It's not supposed to happen this way! I'm supposed to go first. I've always been ready to go first! I-I don't think I can take this! I-I don't think I can take this! I-I just wanna *hit* somebody 'til they feel as bad as I do! I just wanna *hit* something! I wanna *hit it hard*! [continues sobbing]
Clairee: *Here*! [Grabs Ouiser by the shoulder and positions her in front of M'Lynn]
Clairee: *Hit this*! Go ahead M'Lynn, *slap her*!
Ouiser Boudreaux: [Taken aback and confused] Are you crazy?
Clairee: *Hit her*!
Ouiser Boudreaux: *Are you high, Clairee*?
Ouiser Boudreaux: [In a frightened tone] Clairee, have you lost your mind?
Clairee: We'll sell t-shirts sayin' "I SLAPPED OUISER BOUDREAUX!" Hit her!
Annelle: [in a scared tone] Ms. Clairee, enoough!
Clairee: Ouiser, this is your chance to do something for your fellow man! Knock her lights out, M'Lynn!
Ouiser Boudreaux: [snatches away] Let go o' me!
Clairee: M'LYNN, YOU JUST MISSED THE CHANCE OF A LIFETIME! HALF O' CHIQUAPIN PARISH'LL GIVE THEIR EYE-TEETH TO TAKE A WHACK O' OUISER!
Everyone breaks out in laughter.
What a shock. I went from horrible tears to hysterical laughter. (You would have to see the movie to understand.) My point is that even when we are in the grip of deep despair, laughter can catapult us into healing.
I have released a comment by Michael May under the heading of "Happy Family". It was so humorous and filled with good advice that I decided to include most of it here. Thank you Michael.
"The more I learn about being a parent, the harder it gets. Let me explain. Everyone is afraid of different things. It's hard to realize that our fears are not hereditary. Most of the time our children will not share our particular fears.
Take me for example, I am terrified of birds - unless of course it is battered and fried laying on a plate in front of me! Not all birds. Ducks and geese mostly and chickens too. I don't know why. Nothing bad ever happened to me as a child that I recall. But I'm still afraid.
Recently, my wife had some old bread and rather than throw it out she wanted to give it to the ducks. Oh, great. I agreed it was a good idea and I hoped she and the boys would have a great time together. Wrong. She insisted WE were going to take the boys together as a family. "Great", I thought. "She is going to feed ME to the evil ducks." I agreed to go and make the best of it.
Once we got to the pond, I noticed that someone had built a floating dock. Perfect for me to walk out on, fall off of and be eaten by the evil ducks. As the children, bread bags in hand, raced from the car like it was on fire - I took my time, hung back a bit, looking cool, manly man and hoping they wouldn't notice.
Wrong again. They noticed and waited. I caught up to them and opened their bags of bread. My 2-year-old, we call him "Scooter", took my finger and pointed toward the end of the dock. I was frozen in fear until I realized my boys were not afraid of the ducks. They don't break out into a cold sweat thinking that the ducks will jump out of the water and attack them, dragging them under and consuming them whole. My boys appreciated the joy of being outside with Mom and Dad and didn't feel any danger from the sinister quacking of the evil ducks.
This was my fear, not theirs. They were looking to me for assurance. I put on the bravest face I could muster and said as happily as I could, "who wants to feed the ducks?" The boys were none the wiser and I didn't get eaten - not even a finger.
Kenneth and Scooter will have their own fears without me forcing mine on them. Life is hard enough for a young growing mind without taking on my fears. We as parents ought to have a sign tattooed on our forehead, "Keep your fears to yourself, kids have enough of their own."
I will not make my past my children's past. Hopefully, I will leave them a better past than I have had. Isn't that the goal of every good parent? To make the life of their child a little better than their own?"
Thanks Michael! You are exactly right. Parenting and doing the right thing will always put us in uncomfortable places. Children learn far more by watching us overcome our problems than they do with lectures. Children also need to see their parents as heroes. Perhaps next time you feed the ducks you should dress in a superman costume so your boys have a visual as well.....just teasing.....
I've always loved flying. But since 911 I am a walking prayer service when I fly. Hum, maybe a costume would help me too.
God loves you,