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Monday, September 21, 2009

I'm so lonely, can you help me?

Are you lonely?  Do you wish you could find your "soul mate"?  Do you wish there was some kind of road map that would lead you to a red door and behind it you would find your soul mate?

I’ve received many e-mails about dating. Many young people have taken the path of social dating and bed hopping to find their “soul mate”. They believed the lie that movies try to portray. They decided that maybe….just maybe….sex isn’t something God really cares about. Maybe it will be okay if I sleep around.

I’ve also received e-mails from devout Christian young people who are terribly lonely because so many “possible” dates have chosen the intimate path to marriage and they are no longer available to a celibate Christian.

Does God care about your sexual practices? Of course he does! Don’t be ridiculous. Romans 12:1-2 Paul advises us…. Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will.

While I could do a series of lessons on why God demands that Christian singles be celibate, my lesson today is for the lonely singles that desperately want a mate.

1. Does God really want me to marry? After all, Paul said if you didn’t have to….

God wants his children to be happy and victorious. That means that he will not withhold any good thing from his children. God does require that we - “Abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul”. (another big topic) 1 Peter 2:11

Psalms 84:11-12 For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless. O LORD Almighty, blessed is the man who trusts in you.

Matthew 6:33-34 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Go back and read the entire chapter of Matthew 6 and you will see Jesus building not only a commandment, but a structure for his love. He tells you to do your best to be a good person, but to also understand that if God is willing to take care of the birds of the air – how much more is he willing to give to you?

2. Why doesn’t God bring someone into my life ---RIGHT NOW!

There could be several reasons. Perhaps you aren’t ready. Perhaps you are so fixated on having what you want that you are not willing to “truly” wait for his best. Maybe you are thinking of the other person as a “solution” to all your troubles

YOU DO REALIZE no one can be that! Right? You may think they will solve everything, but in time they will become part of your situation rather than a way out.

Maybe the other person isn’t ready. Maybe they have some growing to do. My husband and I have been married for 35 wonderful years. I love him more now than I ever have. But…we both have talked about how we met. We attended a small college of 1,200 and for three years we never even remember seeing each other. Our junior year was a year of change and growth for both of us. When we met our senior year we clicked. We both feel that if we had met any earlier, we would not have seen the value in each other.

God’s timing is best. Wait on him and he will bring your “soul mate” into your life. Don’t worry…he hasn’t forgotten you and you don’t have to settle for someone that isn’t right. Wait for the right one!

Check back for more on this subject.

God loves you,


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