Many parents have the mistaken idea that a child's personality will determine his ability to be thankful. Thoughtfulness and kindness are NOT genetic traits. A child must be taught to be grateful.
Even before a child can speak "YOU" should begin the path to manners by saying "Thank You" and "Please" whenever you can. As soon as they can baby talk, begin requiring at least an attempt at please before responding to their requests. As soon as they can sit up and grasp an item, you can purchase Mommy's present, wrap it and then allow your child to at least hand it to her when it's time.
Daily reinforce giving with a quick game of give and take. When your child is playing with a toy simply say, "May I please have that toy? Thank you." Hug it and immediately return it to the child. This will reinforce the action of letting go of something they want or like.
By 18 months you should be able to begin talking with your child about how special it is to give gifts to others. Take your child to help purchase Daddy's gift and guide him in making a reasonable choice.
At age three your child should be required to purchase, wrap and be totally involved in gift giving. Stress the importance of the thought rather than than the money spent. Don't take little Johnny to buy Daddy a new TV for his birthday. Instead, give him two dollars and guide him through the process. Help him understand that Daddy needs candy for his desk at work. Help him pick out packages of gum or bags of candy. In other words, let him experience gift giving on his level rather than on your level with your finances. A huge plus would be to also insist that he do some chore to earn the money!
It is also important that he learn to give of himself by making the card. There were some years that my children not only made the card but the gift as well. They liked to make coupons. The coupons were as simple as bringing Daddy a cold glass of water or helping him pick up sticks in the yard. The coupons were always something the children could easily do but would be helpful to Ron.
Daddy needs to be very careful about expressing his gratitude. He needs to let his child know that many people are enjoying his candy or how many times a day he thinks of his son while eating the candy. It is a must that Daddy remembers to use the coupons. This will reinforce the joy of giving all year long.
REMEMBER: Your child will only be thoughtful if you are a thoughtful person. It's very difficult to teach something to your child when they don't see it practiced at home.
When children are taught how to give and be thankful, not only will the receivers enjoy the gift but your child will experience contentment and joy.
Mother's Day is May 13th.
God loves you,
Debbie
Monday, April 30, 2007
Saturday, April 28, 2007
Family Etiquette
I hope you are having a wonderful Saturday. I've had a fantastic three days with my son, Ken! He surprised us with a visit and it's been wonderful to catch up on news and hugs.
If all goes well, on May 7th, I will be posting a new page on the website that I hope will help everyone. Several of you have been concerned about raising "close" families. So many children are raised not only to leave the nest but to abandon family relationships as well. What exactly can a parent do to strengthen those bonds so that when children move out the relationship simply switches from child to adult without breaking the love and interaction you shared?
You will be able to find my new page at the "Articles" tab under Family Etiquette. The advice will be short and to the point. I'll deal with issues from babies through young adulthood as well as between spouses and in-laws. I'll try to save reading time by only posting short "lessons". If you need more information you are welcome to contact me through my e-mail.
We all long for close family ties. Coming from a good family will give you wings to soar into your dreams. Dealing with hurts from your family can leave you with improper guilt and self-esteem issues that will prevent your enjoyment of success no matter how talented you are.
Just because someone is related to you doesn't mean they automatically love you. Love can be destroyed. You can allow time and circumstances to build walls between you and anyone in your world. Just like other needs, families require effort to be strong. Follow the rules of family etiquette - cover it with love and you will have a winning formula for a better life.
Teaser: If you treat your friends or co-workers better than you do your family, you are headed for trouble. Instead, you should give more breaks and more love to family members.
If some people I know treated their family members with the same respect they gave to their friends, there would be no strife at all in their family.
Would you scream at your friend and tell them to get out of your life? Would you say no to a co-worker because you didn't want to be bothered helping them with a new project? Would you tell your best friend you hate her and yet still expect her to call you for lunch?
Why then do people scream "I hate you" at their parents or other family members and wonder why things are so hard at home? How can you go out of your way to do favors for people at work who can help you, yet complain because your family asks you to pick up milk on the way home? When frustrated parents yell at their adult children and admit they wish they would leave; why are they surprised when two years later that same child hasn't called or been home?
Look into the future...see how your actions today will change the feelings of those around you. If you can hold your temper with friends -- you are capable of holding it with family. And if you can't hold your temper with friends....Get Some Professional Help. Explosive anger will ruin your life.
Homework for today: Go to everyone in the house and tell them one thing you like about them. Give them a kiss and a big hug. Smile and walk away happy. You have just started a new trend of love.
God loves you
Debbie
If all goes well, on May 7th, I will be posting a new page on the website that I hope will help everyone. Several of you have been concerned about raising "close" families. So many children are raised not only to leave the nest but to abandon family relationships as well. What exactly can a parent do to strengthen those bonds so that when children move out the relationship simply switches from child to adult without breaking the love and interaction you shared?
You will be able to find my new page at the "Articles" tab under Family Etiquette. The advice will be short and to the point. I'll deal with issues from babies through young adulthood as well as between spouses and in-laws. I'll try to save reading time by only posting short "lessons". If you need more information you are welcome to contact me through my e-mail.
We all long for close family ties. Coming from a good family will give you wings to soar into your dreams. Dealing with hurts from your family can leave you with improper guilt and self-esteem issues that will prevent your enjoyment of success no matter how talented you are.
Just because someone is related to you doesn't mean they automatically love you. Love can be destroyed. You can allow time and circumstances to build walls between you and anyone in your world. Just like other needs, families require effort to be strong. Follow the rules of family etiquette - cover it with love and you will have a winning formula for a better life.
Teaser: If you treat your friends or co-workers better than you do your family, you are headed for trouble. Instead, you should give more breaks and more love to family members.
If some people I know treated their family members with the same respect they gave to their friends, there would be no strife at all in their family.
Would you scream at your friend and tell them to get out of your life? Would you say no to a co-worker because you didn't want to be bothered helping them with a new project? Would you tell your best friend you hate her and yet still expect her to call you for lunch?
Why then do people scream "I hate you" at their parents or other family members and wonder why things are so hard at home? How can you go out of your way to do favors for people at work who can help you, yet complain because your family asks you to pick up milk on the way home? When frustrated parents yell at their adult children and admit they wish they would leave; why are they surprised when two years later that same child hasn't called or been home?
Duh!?!
Look into the future...see how your actions today will change the feelings of those around you. If you can hold your temper with friends -- you are capable of holding it with family. And if you can't hold your temper with friends....Get Some Professional Help. Explosive anger will ruin your life.
Homework for today: Go to everyone in the house and tell them one thing you like about them. Give them a kiss and a big hug. Smile and walk away happy. You have just started a new trend of love.
God loves you
Debbie
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Snippets of Greatness
"It is in your moments of decision that your destiny is shaped!"
I'm not sure who made the quote but it is historically true. A beautiful young girl stands at the precipice of her future. The beauty of her future rolls in front of her like a lush garden. All the education is in place, all the business colleagues point the way to success, she is beautiful, she is talented and she is on her way. All she needs is to take one step into the lush green grass and the world of success will bow at her feet. In a moment of vulnerability she is beckoned by an unscrupulous man. She loses focus and turns for what she thinks will only be a passing thought. Unfortunately she is derailed by unwanted passion and an unwanted child.
A young man runs a tough race. He is not one of the elite yet he is strong and determined. He runs past drugs and around ignorance. He studies hard, works hard and finds favor. Just before he gets to the end of this race, he is cheated. Cheated by someone he trusts and belittled by someone he loves. In a moment of deep despair he gives in to drinking, not knowing that the drive home will end his race forever.
We must never let our guard down. Life is not an endless list of tasks divided by moments of comfort and ease. Life is a daily choice determined moment by moment by the decisions we make. Relationships are determined by conversation. Job opportunities are determined by choices we made at college. Evangelism is determined by our love for others. Think of the decisions you make everyday and diagram their outcomes. Concentrate on the little decisions. Was it really necessary to make little Davey wear the blue outfit rather than the green one? How did that make him feel? Would he have had a better day if only he could have worn his favorite? What about the salesgirl at the store, did you make her day better when you fussed about how long she was taking? Was she sick? Was there some problem at home? How did you change her life?
A dear friend of mine sent me this e-mail yesterday. It's a powerful story of how we change lives with simple decisions. I encourage you to make a difference in your life with your "snippets of Greatness".
A few years ago a group of salesmen went to a regional sales convention in Chicago. They had assured their wives that they would be home in plenty of time for Friday night's dinner. In their rush, with tickets and briefcases, one of these salesmen inadvertently kicked over a table which held a display of apples. Apples flew everywhere. Without stopping or looking back, they all managed to reach the plane in time for their flight.
All but one! He paused, took a deep breath, got in touch with his feelings, and experienced a twinge of compassion for the girl whose apple stand had been overturned.
He told his buddies to go on without him, waved good-bye, told one of them to call his wife and explain that he was taking a later flight. He returned to the terminal where the apples were all over the terminal floor.
He was glad he did. The 16-year-old girl was totally blind. She was softly crying. Tears running down her cheeks in frustration, she helplessly groped for her spilled produce. The crowd swirled about her, no one stopping and no one to care for her plight.
The salesman knelt on the floor with her, gathered up the apples and put them back on the table as he organized her display. He set the battered and bruised apples to the side in another basket. When he finished, he pulled out his wallet and said to the girl, "Here, please take this $40 for the damage we did. Are you Okay?"
She nodded through her tears. He continued on with "I hope we didn't spoil your day too badly." As the salesman started to walk away, the bewildered blind girl called out, "Mister..." He paused and turned to look into that innocent face, "Mister...Are you Jesus?"
What will be your snippet of greatness today. You may not think it's much, but even the smallest decision can make a difference in another person's life.
God loves you,
Debbie
I'm not sure who made the quote but it is historically true. A beautiful young girl stands at the precipice of her future. The beauty of her future rolls in front of her like a lush garden. All the education is in place, all the business colleagues point the way to success, she is beautiful, she is talented and she is on her way. All she needs is to take one step into the lush green grass and the world of success will bow at her feet. In a moment of vulnerability she is beckoned by an unscrupulous man. She loses focus and turns for what she thinks will only be a passing thought. Unfortunately she is derailed by unwanted passion and an unwanted child.
A young man runs a tough race. He is not one of the elite yet he is strong and determined. He runs past drugs and around ignorance. He studies hard, works hard and finds favor. Just before he gets to the end of this race, he is cheated. Cheated by someone he trusts and belittled by someone he loves. In a moment of deep despair he gives in to drinking, not knowing that the drive home will end his race forever.
We must never let our guard down. Life is not an endless list of tasks divided by moments of comfort and ease. Life is a daily choice determined moment by moment by the decisions we make. Relationships are determined by conversation. Job opportunities are determined by choices we made at college. Evangelism is determined by our love for others. Think of the decisions you make everyday and diagram their outcomes. Concentrate on the little decisions. Was it really necessary to make little Davey wear the blue outfit rather than the green one? How did that make him feel? Would he have had a better day if only he could have worn his favorite? What about the salesgirl at the store, did you make her day better when you fussed about how long she was taking? Was she sick? Was there some problem at home? How did you change her life?
A dear friend of mine sent me this e-mail yesterday. It's a powerful story of how we change lives with simple decisions. I encourage you to make a difference in your life with your "snippets of Greatness".
Are you Jesus?
A few years ago a group of salesmen went to a regional sales convention in Chicago. They had assured their wives that they would be home in plenty of time for Friday night's dinner. In their rush, with tickets and briefcases, one of these salesmen inadvertently kicked over a table which held a display of apples. Apples flew everywhere. Without stopping or looking back, they all managed to reach the plane in time for their flight.
All but one! He paused, took a deep breath, got in touch with his feelings, and experienced a twinge of compassion for the girl whose apple stand had been overturned.
He told his buddies to go on without him, waved good-bye, told one of them to call his wife and explain that he was taking a later flight. He returned to the terminal where the apples were all over the terminal floor.
He was glad he did. The 16-year-old girl was totally blind. She was softly crying. Tears running down her cheeks in frustration, she helplessly groped for her spilled produce. The crowd swirled about her, no one stopping and no one to care for her plight.
The salesman knelt on the floor with her, gathered up the apples and put them back on the table as he organized her display. He set the battered and bruised apples to the side in another basket. When he finished, he pulled out his wallet and said to the girl, "Here, please take this $40 for the damage we did. Are you Okay?"
She nodded through her tears. He continued on with "I hope we didn't spoil your day too badly." As the salesman started to walk away, the bewildered blind girl called out, "Mister..." He paused and turned to look into that innocent face, "Mister...Are you Jesus?"
Thank you Pastor Wilburn Fisher for sending this.
What will be your snippet of greatness today. You may not think it's much, but even the smallest decision can make a difference in another person's life.
God loves you,
Debbie
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Who do you trust?
If you've read my story you know that I like to dig into situations and problems and find the solution. You have probably guessed that I try to be logical, consider all sides, find the meat, search out the truth....I try to be honest in every situation.
I love a good joke and I like being silly. I've been known to throw snowballs, play horsey with a two-year-old, make faces when I'm supposed to be serious and yes, once and only once (mainly because the mess was just too much to clean up) we had a family water fight in my kitchen. My children were always playing practical jokes and having a good laugh usually took precedence over doing necessary chores.
While having fun is important - being smart is paramount. I feel God calling me to be a beacon of light that will shine the way for others to enjoy life in the same way I have. It's not hard. It's just a matter of being open to making choices that help our lives and avoiding choices that will "ultimately" hurt our lives. ("ultimately" is the operative word here) Some things may seem good right now yet will ruin our futures.
I've been chewing on an issue that bothers me but couldn't get a handle on how to express it to others. I have a problem when people want to use success to gage right or wrong. My youngest son lives in Texas and surprised me last night with an unexpected visit. (Wow! thanks Ken) This morning we were sitting at the table chit chatting. We were talking about pet peeves and he remarked that American Idol really bothered him. "Evaluations about talent should be made by those who can recognize all the necessary elements of truly remarkable talent. That decision should not be left up to the public. Doing so somehow degrades the process."
Thanks Ken. I finally knew how to explain my concerns over anyone willing to judge "right or wrong" by a popularity contest. I don't believe that our forefathers meant for our political process and the future of this country to be decided by popular vote. Popular vote is for electing someone we believe in and trusting him to lead the country into "WHAT IS BEST" for the country. Leading by popularity opens the door for future disasters because popularity doesn't consider long range plans.
I am reminded of an illustration in one of Dad's sermons. "Democracy can only be used in certain situations. It isn't proper to use it everywhere. For example, The democratic process in this country is what allows people to board an airplane. Each passenger has used his freedom to determine when he would leave, what airline he would choose, how long he would stay at his destination and when he would return. That's democracy. We voted for freedom to travel and everyone on the plane is exercising his freedom. But democracy should not be used to fly the airplane. Can you imagine the chaos if the pilot announced that this would be a democratic flight? How crazy and how long would it take to get going if he sent out ballots to determine when and if he was allowed to turn the engines on? Then he sent out another ballot asking which runway to take. And another asking if he should pull back on the wheel at 150 mph or wait until 175mph. And who would want to be on a plane if he sent out ballots saying that we were going to crash into a mountain and do we think he should try to fly around it?"
It is important that we have the ability to trust others. There are some things in our lives that need the expertise of a talented person and we need to let go - trust them and let them do their job. The real problem for Americans is that we don't trust the people around us. And because we haven't made good decisions about the people we've put in control, we spend hours trying to watch over them or worse do their job for them.
Why am I talking about something obviously political rather than dealing with relationships? Because this also speaks to our everyday lives. Do your children trust you? If they don't you can expect trouble as they grow. Most of teen rebellion is due to the fact that teens simply don't trust parents to tell them the truth. Does your spouse trust you? How about your boss? Can your pastor rely on the fact that you will always make decisions in light of your faith?
I spoke with one pastor that was frustrated with the fact that he had to spend just as much time discussing right and wrong with people in their 40's-50's as he did with teens. "By that age shouldn't they have learned something? I need a foundation of strong believers in this church and I don't have it."
Whoa. Trust is important. And like Ken said, some things cannot be decided by amateurs. We live in a country where many lifestyles are based on what feels good rather than on what will make this country stronger. We need strong Christians who are grounded in a desire to find truth. Strong Christians who can spot an unchristian motive and not be moved from their stand for faith. We need strong parents that are determined to raise a family that will illuminate the body of Christ. We need strong individuals who will make decisions based on right and wrong and not just on what's popular or easy or financially profitable. And we need individuals that are determined to be honest, logical, seekers of truth. I want to be friends with that kind of person. I want to know that's a description of my family and I want to put that person in power.
Who do you trust?
God loves you
Debbie
I love a good joke and I like being silly. I've been known to throw snowballs, play horsey with a two-year-old, make faces when I'm supposed to be serious and yes, once and only once (mainly because the mess was just too much to clean up) we had a family water fight in my kitchen. My children were always playing practical jokes and having a good laugh usually took precedence over doing necessary chores.
While having fun is important - being smart is paramount. I feel God calling me to be a beacon of light that will shine the way for others to enjoy life in the same way I have. It's not hard. It's just a matter of being open to making choices that help our lives and avoiding choices that will "ultimately" hurt our lives. ("ultimately" is the operative word here) Some things may seem good right now yet will ruin our futures.
I've been chewing on an issue that bothers me but couldn't get a handle on how to express it to others. I have a problem when people want to use success to gage right or wrong. My youngest son lives in Texas and surprised me last night with an unexpected visit. (Wow! thanks Ken) This morning we were sitting at the table chit chatting. We were talking about pet peeves and he remarked that American Idol really bothered him. "Evaluations about talent should be made by those who can recognize all the necessary elements of truly remarkable talent. That decision should not be left up to the public. Doing so somehow degrades the process."
Thanks Ken. I finally knew how to explain my concerns over anyone willing to judge "right or wrong" by a popularity contest. I don't believe that our forefathers meant for our political process and the future of this country to be decided by popular vote. Popular vote is for electing someone we believe in and trusting him to lead the country into "WHAT IS BEST" for the country. Leading by popularity opens the door for future disasters because popularity doesn't consider long range plans.
I am reminded of an illustration in one of Dad's sermons. "Democracy can only be used in certain situations. It isn't proper to use it everywhere. For example, The democratic process in this country is what allows people to board an airplane. Each passenger has used his freedom to determine when he would leave, what airline he would choose, how long he would stay at his destination and when he would return. That's democracy. We voted for freedom to travel and everyone on the plane is exercising his freedom. But democracy should not be used to fly the airplane. Can you imagine the chaos if the pilot announced that this would be a democratic flight? How crazy and how long would it take to get going if he sent out ballots to determine when and if he was allowed to turn the engines on? Then he sent out another ballot asking which runway to take. And another asking if he should pull back on the wheel at 150 mph or wait until 175mph. And who would want to be on a plane if he sent out ballots saying that we were going to crash into a mountain and do we think he should try to fly around it?"
It is important that we have the ability to trust others. There are some things in our lives that need the expertise of a talented person and we need to let go - trust them and let them do their job. The real problem for Americans is that we don't trust the people around us. And because we haven't made good decisions about the people we've put in control, we spend hours trying to watch over them or worse do their job for them.
Why am I talking about something obviously political rather than dealing with relationships? Because this also speaks to our everyday lives. Do your children trust you? If they don't you can expect trouble as they grow. Most of teen rebellion is due to the fact that teens simply don't trust parents to tell them the truth. Does your spouse trust you? How about your boss? Can your pastor rely on the fact that you will always make decisions in light of your faith?
I spoke with one pastor that was frustrated with the fact that he had to spend just as much time discussing right and wrong with people in their 40's-50's as he did with teens. "By that age shouldn't they have learned something? I need a foundation of strong believers in this church and I don't have it."
Whoa. Trust is important. And like Ken said, some things cannot be decided by amateurs. We live in a country where many lifestyles are based on what feels good rather than on what will make this country stronger. We need strong Christians who are grounded in a desire to find truth. Strong Christians who can spot an unchristian motive and not be moved from their stand for faith. We need strong parents that are determined to raise a family that will illuminate the body of Christ. We need strong individuals who will make decisions based on right and wrong and not just on what's popular or easy or financially profitable. And we need individuals that are determined to be honest, logical, seekers of truth. I want to be friends with that kind of person. I want to know that's a description of my family and I want to put that person in power.
Who do you trust?
God loves you
Debbie
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
A Merry Heart
A merry heart doeth good like a medicine. (Proverbs 17:22)
A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance. (Proverbs 15:13)
He that is of a merry heart hath a continual feast. (Proverbs 15:15)
An elderly woman decided to prepare her will and told her preacher she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Wal-Mart."Wal-Mart?" the preacher exclaimed. "Why Wal-Mart?"
"Then I'll be sure my daughter will visit me twice a week."
After booking my 80-year-old grandmother on a flight from Florida to Nevada, I called the airline to go over her special needs. The representative listened patiently as I requested a wheelchair and an attendant for my mother because of her arthritis and impaired vision to the point of near blindness. My apprehension lightened a bit when the woman assured me that everything would be taken care of. I thanked her profusely.
"Oh you're welcome," she replied. I was about to hang up when she cheerfully asked,...
"And will your grandmother need a rental car?"
A husband and wife were arguing over who should brew the coffee each morning. The bickering went back and forth until the wife finally said, "You should do it, because it's in the Bible that the man should make the coffee."
"There's no way the Bible says that," the husband argued.
Without another word she opened the Bible and pointed to the proof printed at the top of several pages Hebrews. (he-brews)
A painter, out of work for many months, finally was contracted to repaint a nearby church. To boost his profit margin, the painter watered down the paint. As he was applying the thin mixture to the old church, the sky darkened, there was a clap of thunder, then rain. The watered-down paint was washed off the building.
Then a voice from the sky thundered, "Repaint....and thin no more."
Smile - God loves you
Debbie
Monday, April 23, 2007
Christian view of Martyrs
When is it right to be a martyr? Is it always right? Is there a time when the proper Christian response is to fight?
Virginia Tech, Columbine, the war in Iraq, a mugger, an employer high on his own feelings of power, a child whose bullied at school or even a situation where you know someone is being abused. When is it right for a Christian to step into an evil situation and fight?
The good Christian is taught on a regular basis that any anger or strife is bad. We are taught that all words must be filled with soft tones and that it is wrong to bring hardship on an evil person.
"A soft answer turneth away wrath; but grievous words stir up anger." (Proverbs 15:1)
"The discretion of a man defereth his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression." (Proverbs 19:11)
"Make no friendship with an angry man, and with a furious man thou shalt not go; Lest thou learn his ways and get a snare to thy soul." (Proverbs 22:24, 25)
Good stuff....if taken in context. Bad theology if used as a way of life.
If you take a step back and study theology as a whole unit, you will come to the conclusion that the Bible supports that we are here for a purpose. Our main purpose as Christians is to spread the good news of Jesus Christ and to stand up for what we believe in. Standing up for truth - the truth of God - is going to put us in direct opposition to many people. We will find that our light becomes a spotlight to the evil that lives around us. And guess what? They will hate that spotlight. They will want to destroy the spotlight. And if we simple turn it off ---we are then hiding our light under a bushel.
We have been commanded to let our light shine before men. "Ye are the light of the world!" (Matt. 5:14) And if we hide it we are breaking a huge Biblical commandment.
But if we let it shine, we will be attacked. "Every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved." (John 3:20)
And the most alarming problem is that if we remain quiet, if we choose not to fight with evil - evil will then have an easy path to success. With no one to fight, they will take over and spread their evil ways to the ends of the earth - killing Christianity in the process.
Looking back at scriptures on anger I am convinced that those scriptures are encouraging us to not be a hot head. Don't call people names. Don't run around trying to get people fired for not putting lettuce on your hamburger. Don't make foolish demands on obviously overworked employees and don't hurt the innocent around you. In all of your dealings try to see both sides and do what you can to deal with the situation with the love of God.
But just like God, when we see a situation that is definitely evil and will cause harm to others -we must take action. Stand up for what is right. Put on the whole armor of God and go to battle. It is possible to fight without being a hot head.
Practical application :
Parents - do not be timid when it comes to the safety of your child. Again, don't call people names or get so red in the face that you look like you will explode. But do stand firm and strong and using a solid tone of voice - demand that your child will be taken care of. You have that God given right and the law of the land supports that right.
I know of a situation right now where a child is being threaten at school. She has received a note from another 11-year-old that expresses her desire to - "cut you up in little pieces and watch you die." The mother in this situation doesn't want to call the police because she doesn't want to make the other parents and the offending child feel bad. "We are just going to pray about this and let God handle it."
I am certain that God has cupped his hands around his mouth and is yelling from heaven..."NO! You handle this. You take the proper steps to protect your child. I will help you." And unfortunately her misplaced kindness will not be well received, she will still be hated and the offending child will never receive the help she desperately needs. In the process her own child will be hurt mentally, possibly physically and if God chooses to wait on the mother rather than healing the situation - then her own child will suffer spiritually because of conflicting opinions about God's intervention. In other words, refusing to handle the situation will only make it worse.
No woman should ever endure abuse by her husband in order to stay married. Leave him, get out, protect yourself and your children.
No man should run from a fight or turn and look away when someone is being abused. Stand up and be the protective man God called you to be. Don't let evil succeed. Ron (my husband) tells a college story about him and his best friend Dwayne driving through town. They stopped at an intersection and saw a man beating a woman. Without so much as a thought they left the car running, jumped out and intervened in the situation. That was a Godly thing to do.
"The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing." Edmund Burke (1729-97)
We cannot use our Christianity as an excuse so we won't have to deal with a difficult situation. God has called us to be strong Soldiers not wimpy victims.
When we can apply the love of God to any situation - we should. But don't sacrifice yourself when it is not necessary. Stand up in God's power and fight the good fight. Protect your family, your own life, your church, your city and your country so you will be able to continue to share the good news. Shine your light. And when evil is exposed - do whatever is necessary to
remove that evil so your light will continue to shine.
Don't be afraid. God is on your side. "God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power and love." (2 Tim. 1:7)
What do you think?
God loves you
Debbie
Virginia Tech, Columbine, the war in Iraq, a mugger, an employer high on his own feelings of power, a child whose bullied at school or even a situation where you know someone is being abused. When is it right for a Christian to step into an evil situation and fight?
The good Christian is taught on a regular basis that any anger or strife is bad. We are taught that all words must be filled with soft tones and that it is wrong to bring hardship on an evil person.
"A soft answer turneth away wrath; but grievous words stir up anger." (Proverbs 15:1)
"The discretion of a man defereth his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression." (Proverbs 19:11)
"Make no friendship with an angry man, and with a furious man thou shalt not go; Lest thou learn his ways and get a snare to thy soul." (Proverbs 22:24, 25)
Good stuff....if taken in context. Bad theology if used as a way of life.
If you take a step back and study theology as a whole unit, you will come to the conclusion that the Bible supports that we are here for a purpose. Our main purpose as Christians is to spread the good news of Jesus Christ and to stand up for what we believe in. Standing up for truth - the truth of God - is going to put us in direct opposition to many people. We will find that our light becomes a spotlight to the evil that lives around us. And guess what? They will hate that spotlight. They will want to destroy the spotlight. And if we simple turn it off ---we are then hiding our light under a bushel.
We have been commanded to let our light shine before men. "Ye are the light of the world!" (Matt. 5:14) And if we hide it we are breaking a huge Biblical commandment.
But if we let it shine, we will be attacked. "Every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved." (John 3:20)
And the most alarming problem is that if we remain quiet, if we choose not to fight with evil - evil will then have an easy path to success. With no one to fight, they will take over and spread their evil ways to the ends of the earth - killing Christianity in the process.
Looking back at scriptures on anger I am convinced that those scriptures are encouraging us to not be a hot head. Don't call people names. Don't run around trying to get people fired for not putting lettuce on your hamburger. Don't make foolish demands on obviously overworked employees and don't hurt the innocent around you. In all of your dealings try to see both sides and do what you can to deal with the situation with the love of God.
But just like God, when we see a situation that is definitely evil and will cause harm to others -we must take action. Stand up for what is right. Put on the whole armor of God and go to battle. It is possible to fight without being a hot head.
Practical application :
Parents - do not be timid when it comes to the safety of your child. Again, don't call people names or get so red in the face that you look like you will explode. But do stand firm and strong and using a solid tone of voice - demand that your child will be taken care of. You have that God given right and the law of the land supports that right.
I know of a situation right now where a child is being threaten at school. She has received a note from another 11-year-old that expresses her desire to - "cut you up in little pieces and watch you die." The mother in this situation doesn't want to call the police because she doesn't want to make the other parents and the offending child feel bad. "We are just going to pray about this and let God handle it."
I am certain that God has cupped his hands around his mouth and is yelling from heaven..."NO! You handle this. You take the proper steps to protect your child. I will help you." And unfortunately her misplaced kindness will not be well received, she will still be hated and the offending child will never receive the help she desperately needs. In the process her own child will be hurt mentally, possibly physically and if God chooses to wait on the mother rather than healing the situation - then her own child will suffer spiritually because of conflicting opinions about God's intervention. In other words, refusing to handle the situation will only make it worse.
No woman should ever endure abuse by her husband in order to stay married. Leave him, get out, protect yourself and your children.
No man should run from a fight or turn and look away when someone is being abused. Stand up and be the protective man God called you to be. Don't let evil succeed. Ron (my husband) tells a college story about him and his best friend Dwayne driving through town. They stopped at an intersection and saw a man beating a woman. Without so much as a thought they left the car running, jumped out and intervened in the situation. That was a Godly thing to do.
"The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing." Edmund Burke (1729-97)
We cannot use our Christianity as an excuse so we won't have to deal with a difficult situation. God has called us to be strong Soldiers not wimpy victims.
When we can apply the love of God to any situation - we should. But don't sacrifice yourself when it is not necessary. Stand up in God's power and fight the good fight. Protect your family, your own life, your church, your city and your country so you will be able to continue to share the good news. Shine your light. And when evil is exposed - do whatever is necessary to
remove that evil so your light will continue to shine.
Don't be afraid. God is on your side. "God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power and love." (2 Tim. 1:7)
What do you think?
God loves you
Debbie
Sunday, April 22, 2007
God is showing off again!
My Dad, Rev. Ken Crocker, loved to tell stories about children. They can shock you as well as tickle your funny bone. More often than not, their pure honesty will reveal some theological truth that we all need to hear.
Today is a beautiful sunny day. I've prayed for this day. I have arthritis. Gloomy days not only pull at my upbeat spirit but also leave my bones aching. On those days my thoughts are filled with prayers and wishing for the sun.
I'm enjoying the birds singing and the swaying of bright tulips in the front yard. If only, I could also smell my mother making fried chicken and strawberry pie - my day would be perfect.
I am reminded of a story my Dad tells about a young mother looking out her kitchen window and fussing about what a horrible day it was. Rain was pelting the window and dark clouds rumbled in the distance. Her young son looked up from his crackling cereal and said, "Never judge a day by the weather. The sun is shinning somewhere."
Out of the mouth of children......
Another Minister used to start every sermon in the summer by announcing to the audience. "Isn't it beautiful outside. God is showing off again."
We should all remember that there is more to our faith than praying for gloomy days to disappear. We should also look around and thank God for all the wonderful blessing we see, smell, hear, taste and touch.
God loves you
Debbie
Today is a beautiful sunny day. I've prayed for this day. I have arthritis. Gloomy days not only pull at my upbeat spirit but also leave my bones aching. On those days my thoughts are filled with prayers and wishing for the sun.
I'm enjoying the birds singing and the swaying of bright tulips in the front yard. If only, I could also smell my mother making fried chicken and strawberry pie - my day would be perfect.
I am reminded of a story my Dad tells about a young mother looking out her kitchen window and fussing about what a horrible day it was. Rain was pelting the window and dark clouds rumbled in the distance. Her young son looked up from his crackling cereal and said, "Never judge a day by the weather. The sun is shinning somewhere."
Out of the mouth of children......
Another Minister used to start every sermon in the summer by announcing to the audience. "Isn't it beautiful outside. God is showing off again."
We should all remember that there is more to our faith than praying for gloomy days to disappear. We should also look around and thank God for all the wonderful blessing we see, smell, hear, taste and touch.
God loves you
Debbie
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